The Most Awesomest People of 2014-- part 2

Part One was yesterday.... Here's part Two!

6. The Walking Dead cast and crew
This is, without a doubt, the best show on TV right now. If you're not watching it, you should. The characters, the acting, the special effects-- all awesome. Oh, and there are zombies, too. What more could you possibly ask for?

This will NOT happen #darrylforever

7. U2
U2 used to be one my favorite bands. The album Achtung Baby was mind blowing for me. But that was 25 years ago. It's safe to say that U2 has passed their prime. But on September 9, U2 gave away their newest album, Songs of Innocence, to all 500 million iTunes users, completely free of charge.

The result was probably not what they were expecting. The Agent thought somebody had hacked into his account and almost cancelled everything. Other people cried about the memory it took up on their phones, and still others complained that The Man was trying to tell the people what to listen to. Oh, Please. In the words of U2's manager, "If you don't like it, delete it."

But still, it was a brilliant move for my man Bono. He received an undisclosed sum from Apple (read: serious moolah) and he was able to advertise his album to half a billion people instantly. Well played, U2!

8. Ebola survivors
Hey, remember when we were all scared about Ebola a couple months ago? And it hit Texas and we all ran to CVS to get our paper masks?  My city's mayor took to Facebook, saying that our hospitals needed to be better equipped to deal with the impending outbreak.  Whatever happened to those days?

Well, we've reached the end of 2014, and we have 2 confirmed US deaths. For the math nerds out there, that would be 0.000000625% of the US population. Like the swine flu and the West Nile virus, Ebola seems to be kind of a big dud. Way to overcome. 

9. Elsa
I have to admit, my favorite part of Frozen is when Elsa is singing Let it Go and she transforms from goody two shoes Elsa into naughty nightclub Elsa. I even considered dressing up like Elsa for Halloween, but then I saw that every other girl in the US had already purchased all the Elsa costumes in existence. Did you play the drinking game on Halloween, where you drank a shot every time a different Elsa came trick or treating at your door? I did... until I ran out of rum. Elsa even started pimping herself out at birthday parties! Here she is (with her sister Anna) telling her story to Bug and her friends:

10. Scarf Wearers

For once, I am trendy before my time! I've wearing a scarf as an accessory for years, but this is the year that it really started to take off. Even men, as evidenced in Andi's season of Bachelorette, are wearing scarves. And it's time to get fancy with your scarf wearing! Gone are the days of the simple wrap around the neck. Now there are at least a dozen popular ways to wear to wear your scarf. And the good thing is, a scarf can be worn for any occasion, dressed up or down. And even here in California, it gets chilly enough to wear a light scarf in winter. Don't know how to tie a scarf?  Watch and learn:

That's it! Have a safe New Year's Eve, and I'll see you next year!

The Most Awesomest People of 2014-- part 1

Hey, if Barbara Walters can do it, so can I!  This is my list of the people who fascinated me this year, in no particular order...

1. Taylor Swift
Hello, my name is Lovely and I like Taylor Swift. I'm not ashamed to admit it. I'm not a crazy fan girl or anything, but the woman is an amazing artist. Even more than her music, I love the message she sends. She is a wholesome American girl, who is clearly having fun and adores her fans. And tell me you don't start dancing every single time "Shake It Off" comes on. I be like Will Smith:

 2. Chris Soules
Actually, Prince Farming will probably be on my list for 2015. On January 5th, his journey to find love will begin airing on The Bachelor. Yes, of course I will be blogging about it. But I became a fan Farmer Chris earlier this year, when he met Bachelorette Andi Dorfman, he fell in love, and she broke his heart.  You chose wrong, Andi. Your loss.

3. Ice Bucket Challengers
You couldn't get online this summer without watching another video of someone dumping a bucket of ice water on their head. The idea is that if you're challenged, you have 24 hours to post a video  of a bucket of water being dumped on your head and donate $10 to ALS, or don't post the video and donate $100. Some celebrities were kind enough to pour water on their heads AND donate money, and some people chose to donate money to the charity of their choice instead of to ALS. I was challenged and then Bug was challenged, but dumping water on our heads was not on our list of fun things to do. Here's Matt Damon using toilet water to raise awareness for water.org:

4. Jimmy Fallon
I love me some Jimmy Fallon. He is so dang hilarious. Now, unfortunately, I need my beauty rest, so I can never stay up late enough to watch the show as it airs. But luckily there's Youtube, so I get to see all the best clips. I love the lip sync battles... or when Jimmy and The Roots perform with famous singers using toy instruments. Chris Pine was just on recently playing Battleship, but if you get a hit, the opponent has to drink a shot. And here's Adam Levine, singing musical impressions. Love him!

5. Seth Rogen
Ok, let's be honest. Who thinks the whole North Korea/Sony thing was just a hoax pulled off by Seth? I feel like Seth Rogen knew the movie was going to be a dud and he wouldn't make any money, so he practiced on his best Korean accent and called up the president of Sony himself. Because now EVERYONE wants to see this movie, and itunes is cashing in. iTunes is charging 5.99 to rent or 14.99 to buy this craptastic movie. A movie  no one really cared about in the first place  is going to make serious money. Go, Seth! Your evil planned worked!

Stay tuned tomorrow for Part Two! 

Christmas Update!

Oops. I kind of fell off the blogging map there for a bit. So this is what I did the weekend BEFORE Christmas.


I had Friday off, and since it was the last day of school, I hung out at the school all day and volunteered. BK's kindergarten class made gingerbread houses and decorated gingerbread cookies, and Bug's third grade class watched a movie and ate nachos and chips and other junk.

But poor BK. He had made so many bad choices that he didn't get to make the gingerbread house or decorate cookies. While all the other kids had fun (and while I helped them), BK had to sit at a table by himself and do paperwork. Poor baby. It broke my heart. But when you make bad choices, there are consequences.

 

Our hope is that he realized what he was missing out on and will make better choices in the future. But on the plus side, he was the only kid in the class not hyped up on sugar afterwards!

On Friday night, I left the kids at home with The Agent and went to BFF's house for her annual "Ugly Christmas Sock" party. Like an ugly sweater party, but with socks. I liked it, because I can keep wearing Christmas socks all year round, and BFF likes it because it means no one can wear shoes in her house.

At first, the party  was a dud. Like there was maybe 10 people there. But there are advantages to having a small party. We ended up playing Apples to Apples and we had a great time.

There is no photographic evidence of this party. Probably a good thing.

And then other stuff happened on Saturday and Sunday. I have no idea what. Oh, except this cutie lost his first tooth:

OK, On to Christmas!

I was one of three people in the state of California who had to work the entire day on Christmas Eve. So while The Agent and the kids went out to breakfast and then did some last minute shopping, I was at work, being bitter. I ran out the door, my last day for the rest of the year, at 5:01 and I was home by 5: 05. Praise Jesus!

We don't really do anything on Christmas Eve, but after dinner, the kids got to open one gift; their Christmas pajamas, a movie, and packs of popcorn and hot chocolate. Then we snuggled in to watch our Christmas movie: How to Train Your Dragon 2.

All of us in our Christmas pj's

And then Santa came!

First, we opened our gifts at home:

Dumb Dog needed to get in the shot.

This box was filled with a dozen Magic Treehouse books. Bug was so excited!

The gift his sister picked out for BK

After we tore up our living room, we moved on to my parents' house so we could destroy their living room:

Mass spoilage

The Whole Family!

It was a great holiday... and the best part is, I still have a week off! Whoo hoo!

Wordless Wednesday

November 15, 2014

Merry Christmas!

Just your average Christmas party

I had my department holiday party last week, so The Agent and I got a babysitter and went out in an effort to be social.

I didn't tell The Agent until we were on our way that there wouldn't be any alcohol there.

The Agent is pretty shy, and he needs some "liquid courage" in order to endure the small talk required at these things. So he sat in a corner at the party, listening to the conversation around him and silently cussing me for not allowing him to drink before we arrived.

But what he didn't know, and I did, was that with the people I work with,  you don't need to drink in order to be entertained.

Allow me to give you a few conversation nuggets:

One of my coworkers was telling The Agent a story  about a mutual coworker who keeps a jar of cashews at his desk. She had grabbed a handful of cashews out of the jar, but then dropped the jar on the floor, making a huge mess.

"So I'm kneeling on the floor with Tom's nuts in my hand, and I really wanted to eat them, but everyone was staring at me." She doesn't even realize how sexual she sounds, and The Agent is nearly choking trying to hold himself together.

"You really like Tom's nuts then, do you?" The Agent asked with a straight face.

"I LOVE them!"

His nuts are in her hands


****************

At another point, I heard someone tell The Agent that it's a proven fact that people who fold their toilet paper have IQ's 30 to 60 points higher than people who crumple their toilet paper.

"How would you even  test that?" The Agent asked.

"My cousin wrote his senior thesis on it. He got an A. Think about it the next time you're on the john."

It was time to call it a night at that point.

there is a surprisingly large amount of choices if you google scrunch v fold

The Agent and I thanked our hostess for a lovely evening, and I said goodbye to my coworkers. The Agent opened the car door for me, helped me in, then got in himself and drove away.

"Babe," he said, "You work with some effin'  crazy people."

I laughed while The Agent spent the next ten minutes ranting. "How do you not have the best numbers in your department? How is the crazy not rubbing off on you? You are officially not allowed to talk to any of them. Seriously, Babe. How do you make it at work every day? Everything I heard was crazier than the last.  I really needed to pee, but I didn't want to miss anything!"

"Well, and then plus everyone would have asked you if you folded or crumpled the paper."





 

Weekend Update

I think I mentioned already (or maybe you noticed from my lack of posts) that I had to travel for work this week. This was a very eventful trip, but I'm not sure that any of it is blog worthy. I also went to my work party, which was VERY blog worthy! Stay tuned for the story of that craziness.

Friday was uneventful, other than I got passed up for yet another promotion. The guy who got the job actually has the least amount of tenure out of everyone who applied. But I'm ok with that. I would rather have them promote someone without a lot of time with the company, because at least I don't know what kind of worker he is. If they had hired anyone else, I would have been more upset, because then I would have KNOWN that I was a better worker than that!

But here's the weird part. They called a floor meeting so they could announce this guy's promotion. The main boss of the office was  talking, doing general announcements, and the guy walked up to the front, whispered that he'll be right back, and walked right out of the office.

I was standing next to one my closest girlfriends from the office, who also happened to be the hiring manager for this promotion. From the positions we were in, we're the only ones who would see out the window. We had a clear view of this guy, who just got promoted. He was outside, pacing on the sidewalk. It appeared that he was talking to himself.

"Who is he talking to?" my girlfriend whispered to me. "Is there someone out there? Is he on his phone?"

"He's definitely not on his phone, and there's no one else out there," I answered. "What's wrong with him?"

"He looks manic. Is he bi-polar?"

"Dude, you hired a crazy person."

At this  point, we could see the guy take a deep breath and walk back inside. "Are you ok???" I mouthed to him.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he whispered back. "Nerves, I guess."

Welcome to the head of operations.

*******

On Saturday, I wrapped every present  and addressed all our Christmas cards. It feels so good to have that done! We also finished our teacher gifts:

I love how these little books turned out! I'll see if I can do a tutorial later this week.

Nothing else exciting happened on Saturday. The fact that I have all the Christmas presents wrapped is exciting enough.

*******

Sunday found us being social! The kids were invited to two cookie decorating parties: one in the morning, one in the afternoon. BK made the mistake of eating every cookie he decorated, so I wasn't able to take a picture. Here's Bug with hers: 

After eating 27 million cookies, BK wasn't in any shape to make it to the next party, so he stayed home with The Agent while Bug and I went to round two with her friends from school:

She came home with a belly ache, and joined BK on the sofa to watch a Wild Kratt marathon.

And I was finally done playing chauffeur and was able to drink a Captain and Diet.

The Protector

The kids and I were shopping on Saturday and we stopped for lunch at Five Guys. Ever been there? Far superior to In N Out or Habit or Smash Burger. Anyway, we're there, eating our burgers, and in walks a boy and his dad. The boy was maybe 10, tall and slender, cute. He had spiky hair, which I was particularly fond of.

Now, Bug has never been one to really care about her appearance. She was wearing cut off jean shorts over black leggings and plain blue tshirt. Her hair was down and tangled. I didn't think much of it. That's just how my child looks.

So, this boy and his dad are eating, and we're eating, and no one else is in the restaurant. Bug asked if she could go to the bathroom. Yes, you may.

Five minutes later, Bug comes out of the bathroom. She has her hair tied up  in a low side pony tail, Elsa style. She's washed her face and she added Chapstick.

I'm sure she thought she looked exactly like T-swift.

"You look nice," I said. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," Bug said casually. "I just went to the bathroom." And then she looked over her shoulder and made eye contact with the boy.

Oh, gross.

"Wait.... do you know that boy?"

"Who, him? No, I don't know him. I've never seen him before."

"Then why are you acting like that?"

"Like what? I'm just, you know.... I don't know."

"Yeah, I don't know either. You're 8. And I don't like his spiky hair. Let's go."

 We got up to leave. BK had been pretty silent up until this point. But as we passed the boy and his father on our way out, BK said to the boy in his little 5-year-old voice, "I'm watching you. Stay away from my sister."

Oh, Lord.

"It's OK BK, let's go." I pulled BK away, while he continued to stare down the now very confused boy.

At least I know that BK's ready to protect his sister!

Weekend Update

I have an incredibly busy week coming up and I'm feeling pretty sick right now, but I decided to get up from my death bed long enough to give you a weekend update. That's how much I love you. Just putting that out there.

Friday started out pretty good. We had a raffle at work to raise money to give to our local foster care,  and I won one of the prizes! It was a pet care basket-- look at all the stuff I got:

I put this under the tree for our furbabies:

Big Boy Ash particularly liked the pet bed-- it's just big enough for a large cat (although I think it's supposed to be for a small dog):

After work on Friday night, Bug had a birthday party to go to. It was at our local clubhouse, with special guests Ana and Elsa: 

Quite the fancy shindig:

During the party, I started to get a massive headache. I didn't really think anything of it, I just thought 20 8-year-olds running around was giving me a headache. Bug and I came home, and I went straight to bed while The Agent tried to calm Bug off her sugar high.

On Saturday, I wasn't feeling all that great, but this is the Christmas season, and I don't have time to sit around. We donated toys:

And dog food:

And then I started wrapping presents:

 And finished decorating the house:

It was a pretty productive day.

On Sunday, I woke up to the grim reaper looking into my eyes. OK, maybe it was BK asking for breakfast, but that's how I felt. I stumbled downstairs to make breakfast and then plopped down on the couch. And there I stayed for the next 12 hours. I did nothing. I didn't clean, I didn't shop, I didn't even put on a bra all day. Thank goodness that The Agent was able to hold down the fort during my cootie infested state. I didn't take a single picture.

I have a wicked busy week at work this week, including a business trip to the metropolis of Lancaster (never heard of it? It's ok, you're not missing anything). I also have an interview for a promotion, and  two Christmas parties this week. So busy! So hopefully I can shake this bug or virus or cold or whatever so I can properly function!