It’s been a busy week. Bug’s ballet recital, swim lessons, Pre-K graduation, BK’s birthday, and Father’s Day all happening at once made for a hectic Mommy. Not to mention I’ve been sick with the flu (threw up at work yesterday-- ultimately embarrassing).
So, it was probably about 9 pm tonight before I even thought about you. I want you to know, we had a good day. BK got a battery powered quad for his birthday, so he was having fun with that. We all enjoyed birthday cupcakes for dessert, and then sang an out-of-tune version of Happy Birthday. BK was a happy boy, and went to bed well.
After the kids were in bed, I was able to reflect on the last two years. Our lives are so full, so complete. And to be perfectly honest, I think maybe that’s why it took me so long to remember you. It’s so hard to think that BK could belong to anyone but me. It’s almost as if I gave birth to him myself.
But I wonder if you’re thinking of us today, and what you gave us.
Two years ago, you had a baby. A beautiful perfect baby boy. And I don’t know what was going in your life then, but for whatever reason, you didn’t think you would be able to provide the baby with what he needed. I cannot even begin to imagine what a difficult decision this must have been for you. And it would have been so easy to just keep the baby and struggle through. In my mind, placing the baby in the hands of another when you know you can't take care of him is just about the most selfless act imaginable, but I don’t know if you realize that.
Are you thinking about him today, wondering if he’s ok? Please know that he is doing well. He runs and jumps better than his sister does. He’s still not a big talker, doesn't talk in complete sentences yet, but can understand everything you say to him. His big thing is asking "Why?" to everything you say. He is constantly smiling, but will only giggle if something is really funny. He has the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen.
Know that he is in a happy home. He has his own room, 2 dogs to lick him, a cat to torment, toys to play with, and a Mommy and Daddy to snuggle with.
Know that he has an older sister he adores. You should see him follow her around. It was hard to pick out toys that he might like for his birthday, because he’s always too busy running after his sister to even bother with toys. She walks into the room, and his entire face lights up. She is his everything, and she feels the same away about him.
Know that he is healthy. There have been no allergies, no colds, no reactions, and no drug or alcohol withdrawals. He has never had to go to the doctor for anything other than well baby visits.
Most of all, know that he is loved. Know I am eternally grateful to you. You have given me a most precious gift. Thank you.
Always,
I can't imagine that she isn't thinking about him and wondering what he's doing and what his life is like.
ReplyDeleteI can't believe it's been 2 years! It seems like just yesterday when I read he had been placed with you. Sending you and your birthmom along with ours many hugs, thanks and love!
how beautiful. your letter gave me goosebumps. such a sweet tribute, and so much gratitude for her. *HUG*
ReplyDeleteYes, truly beautiful. Tears in my eyes.
ReplyDeleteThis is so beautiful. I think back to when BK came into your life and I, too, think about that woman who so selflessly gave him up to a family who needed him as much as he needed them.
ReplyDeleteso sweet. good for you and good for BK. it was meant to be.
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