The T-Bar

One of my friends suggested I make a T-Bar--- you, know, list all the reasons to go in one column, and all the reasons to stay in the other. I wasn't going to do it, because I constantly have a T-Bar going in my head. Plus, there are some reasons that I feel are worth two or even three entries ("live with family guilt for the rest of my life" should be at worth at least seven entries, right?). But this will go back to writing about my problems. If I write it out, it might bring clarity. So here we go. 

Reasons to go:

• ·         There is less crime in the Arizona city than in the California city.
• ·         theArizona cities are cleaner than the Stockton city (very little graffiti, garbage on the ground, etc)
• ·         There is room for growth at my job if we move to Arizona. My husband has reached the top of his salary. 
• ·         We can afford the type of house we want in Arizona. We can not do that in California.
• ·         I pay the medical insurance, and my company offers better insurance than at my husband's company.
• ·         There is a chance that my husband will be able to work remotely from Arizona temporarily. There is no chance of my company making the same offer for me. 
• ·         Although our bank account will take an initial hit, after 5 years it is projected to exceed what we would have saved had we stayed in California.
• ·         The Arizona tuition for residents is less than the California tuition for residents.
• ·         The taxes in Arizona are less than the taxes in California.
• ·         The chances of me being able to secure a new job in California for the same pay is slim.
• ·         Any new job I get may not provide nights and weekends off, or give me the same work-life balance that my company provides.

Reasons to stay:

• ·         If something happens to my dad and I’m not able to get to him in time, I will have to live with that guilt for the rest of my life.
• ·         We are projected to have more money in our savings account at the end of five years if we stay.
• ·         The children are already in an excellent school—There is no guarantee that they will get in to a charter school in Arizona, and the public schools are very poorly rated.
• ·         The house that we wanted is no longer for sale, and there are no other houses that we like.
• ·         There are 95 days until we would HAVE to move (and 84 days until we WANTED to move). That is not enough time to do everything we wanted to do before we moved, when we’re both working every day.
• ·         There is no guarantee that we would be able to sell our California house before we left. Therefore two mortgages.
• ·         Our dog is extremely old. We do not think she would do well in Arizona. If we moved, she likely would not go with us. 
• ·         There will be snakes and scorpions in our backyard in Arizona.
• ·         The temperature averages over 100 for 3 months of the year. And it’s over 90 for 2 additional months. 

      Is there any clarity? Does the answer magically pop out at you?